Just read this exchange, and I pretty uch agree on everything. My experience with watching the show is much different from other fans'; I caught up on the whole series, in order, about one episode a day, until I was caught up right before season seven aired. Perhaps as a result of the speed with which the episodes happened, or maybe because my emotional reactions are sometimes pretty delayed, I never got particularly angry at any character. And I never got attached to any readings before the show went and Jossed me (until season seven). As a result, I was actually kind of mystified at first by how many fans hated s6, and why -- and even the very idea that Spike, or Buffy, or Willow, or Xander, or Anya, or Dawn, or Giles (depending on the fan!) would be irredeemable, and could never come back from anything.

I actually liked the AR as a story point. I don't think that it's OOC, personally -- nor do I think it is black and white. But I recognize why so many people have problems with it.

(I have my own thoughts on how Spike's soullessness is consistent with his altruism throughout the season, but this isn't the place for them, I think.)