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shadowkat1. Saw a post about not being that fannish any longer...and I pondered. First of all, have I really been active in any fandom besides Buffy/Angel? Not really. Oh I've fallen in love with other works. But I haven't joined the fandoms. I'm not a serial fan (I always want to call it cereal fan for some reason).
No, the Buffy fandom was the only one that I was ever really active in or really participated in. At one point, I got "BigFanName" status for my Buffy/Angel meta...this was in 2002-2006. It was short lived. Thank god. Found it embarrassing. I don't like being the center of attention. My father and I once had a discussion about becoming a famous novelist and we both decided it would be hell. People are more critical -- I think it's tall poppy syndrome. And they also...well, squee over you and act like they personally know you. Bleach. Go away people. I don't want fans. Of my work, sure, of me? No.
Also, I tend to be highly critical of the things I love. Which is a big turn off for a lot of fans, who just want to worship at the altar of the thing they are fannish about. I, as a general rule, do not "worship" anything. I find it irritating. I don't want to be worshipped and I do not want to worship anything else. Which puts me at odds with fandom on most occasions. Too analytical for the fandom.
Why is this? And more importantly why JUST the Buffy fandom?
I think it had a lot to do with timing and various things coming together at the same time. A confluence of events, as it were. Or intersection of events. While I'd started watching Buffy pretty much from when it aired, and had actually seen the movie in the movie theater (very disappointed in it -- the novelization was better, read it in the book store), I did not get involved in the fandom until halfway through the second to last season. In fact I joined the fandom in February of 2002, after lurking for months on various fan boards. I didn't find the fan board that worked for me until March/April of 2002. That's the one that eventually became home and I made friends at. The difference between it and the others...was it was more analytical and academic/scholarly in nature -- and less, well about squeeing over the show and/or whining over it or speculating/fighting over the spoilers, or fighting/speculating over who the lead should romantically ride off into the sunset with. (My theory was she wouldn't end up with anyone. Because I figured out the writers weren't writing a romance, but a horror tale about female self-empowerment, which sort of runs counter to Buffy setting up house with either Spike or Angle or anyone for that matter. In other words, they'd kill off all the four lead characters major romantic love interests before the finale credits rolled. Which, guess what, they sort of did. This was pretty much foreshadowed in S1, then repeated every season in various places just in case no one picked up on it. People did, but they were hoping they were wrong, because the audience liked the romantic love interests better than the leads and didn't want that particular ending. This resulted in more than a little friction between the writer's vision and the audience's vision. And I think that was one of the reason's I got fannish about it, because I thought it was ambitious of the writers to run directly counter to what the majority of their audience wanted.) Or sharing fanfic, or vids, or chatting. I wanted the in-depth scholarly discussion of the themes. And I found it, purely by writing lots and lots of meta.
Anyhow, the reason I got fannish about Buffy was --
* my mood at the time (without going into gory detail, I was sort of in the same emotional and mental place as the characters in the show),
* the way the internet was set up at the time (there's no way I'd have gotten that fannish or written that much meta in today's world -- too many platforms, I'd have gotten lost. I think it is harder to be fannish about things now than it was back then.) In 2002, fanboards were varied, but not as varied as they are now. Twitter didn't exist (thank god), nor did Facebook. We had Voy Forums, which while a nuisance at times, were actually easier to moderate, monitor, archive, and follow. You just followed specific threads. Also items jumped to archive leaving room for new discussions. Each board had clear rules. And you usually could figure out what the mood of the board was fairly quickly. There were no GIFS or hard to download photos and vids, or there were, but not quite as many. And, there wasn't as many platforms to keep track of.
* the way the series was shown -- it wasn't bingable. DVDs just began to come out in 2002. We didn't have the ability to binge watch the series like we do now. People either saw it on UPN or an affiliate, or downloaded it from satellite feed to their computers. Or they saw it on a channel overseas that had rights. As a result, you had to be more careful about spoilers. And there were long waits between episodes. So lots of time to write meta, speculate, and entertain yourselves on boards.
* less content back then. I only had access to about fifty channels if that. I had Standard Cable.
UPN barely came in. At one point I had basic or just broadcast. So I was only really watching a handful of shows. Also, I had a VCR not DVD player, so we could only tape one show at a time. Filling tapes. It was harder to see past episodes, and if you missed one, you networked with other fans to get it. Also taped it on FX, which showed the previous seasons.
The internet was just starting to explode. Less information. And less websites. Easier to find things. Google didn't exist. It was a different world.
Now? There's just too many choices. And you get things so quickly. Also, when one show ends, there's another out there that you can binge. If you miss an episode -- you can get a hold of it elsewhere.
You don't need to ask someone on a fanboard to provide you with a link to it, or help you get a hold of it. There's no long waits between episodes...so you don't need to speculate, discuss, analyze or try to figure out where it's headed. The anticipation time is less.
No, if Buffy had premiered in 2010, I doubt I'd have become part of the fandom. It wasn't just the content, but a combination of who I was then, what I needed and what the world around me provided.
And that just hasn't happened to me again. I'm not upset about that. I don't really miss the fandom as much as you'd think. I'd say I miss the people -- but many I've stayed in contact with in other ways. There's a few that I've lost contact with completely, but that's true with everything.
I don't regret being in the fandom. It came at a time in my life in which I desperately need it. And it sort of saved my life. Also, there's people from it, that I'm still in touch with and friends with now. And I'm thankful they are still in my life. I'd not have met them otherwise. I'd like to think I might have...but I doubt it. So I'm grateful for the Buffy fandom, I'm grateful that the show existed. And I'm glad that of all the fandoms that I chose to be become a part of, I picked that one.
It was a pretty cool fandom. It still is, in its own way, even though I've long since left it.
2. Random quotes taken out of context on my correspondence list that made me laugh.
* "The psychologist is a ghost" - from an icon
* "That was Excellent. I'd Bang You Again." - from a greeting card found on SmartBitches. (I'm amazed such a thing exists.
* "Do you have any stationery?
What is stationery?
Paper? Envelopes?
No, why would you need that?
To send a letter.
Why don't you just send an email?"
- from a tweet by Shaun Cassidy who was staying at a hip hotel in NYC, and asked for stationery.
No, the Buffy fandom was the only one that I was ever really active in or really participated in. At one point, I got "BigFanName" status for my Buffy/Angel meta...this was in 2002-2006. It was short lived. Thank god. Found it embarrassing. I don't like being the center of attention. My father and I once had a discussion about becoming a famous novelist and we both decided it would be hell. People are more critical -- I think it's tall poppy syndrome. And they also...well, squee over you and act like they personally know you. Bleach. Go away people. I don't want fans. Of my work, sure, of me? No.
Also, I tend to be highly critical of the things I love. Which is a big turn off for a lot of fans, who just want to worship at the altar of the thing they are fannish about. I, as a general rule, do not "worship" anything. I find it irritating. I don't want to be worshipped and I do not want to worship anything else. Which puts me at odds with fandom on most occasions. Too analytical for the fandom.
Why is this? And more importantly why JUST the Buffy fandom?
I think it had a lot to do with timing and various things coming together at the same time. A confluence of events, as it were. Or intersection of events. While I'd started watching Buffy pretty much from when it aired, and had actually seen the movie in the movie theater (very disappointed in it -- the novelization was better, read it in the book store), I did not get involved in the fandom until halfway through the second to last season. In fact I joined the fandom in February of 2002, after lurking for months on various fan boards. I didn't find the fan board that worked for me until March/April of 2002. That's the one that eventually became home and I made friends at. The difference between it and the others...was it was more analytical and academic/scholarly in nature -- and less, well about squeeing over the show and/or whining over it or speculating/fighting over the spoilers, or fighting/speculating over who the lead should romantically ride off into the sunset with. (My theory was she wouldn't end up with anyone. Because I figured out the writers weren't writing a romance, but a horror tale about female self-empowerment, which sort of runs counter to Buffy setting up house with either Spike or Angle or anyone for that matter. In other words, they'd kill off all the four lead characters major romantic love interests before the finale credits rolled. Which, guess what, they sort of did. This was pretty much foreshadowed in S1, then repeated every season in various places just in case no one picked up on it. People did, but they were hoping they were wrong, because the audience liked the romantic love interests better than the leads and didn't want that particular ending. This resulted in more than a little friction between the writer's vision and the audience's vision. And I think that was one of the reason's I got fannish about it, because I thought it was ambitious of the writers to run directly counter to what the majority of their audience wanted.) Or sharing fanfic, or vids, or chatting. I wanted the in-depth scholarly discussion of the themes. And I found it, purely by writing lots and lots of meta.
Anyhow, the reason I got fannish about Buffy was --
* my mood at the time (without going into gory detail, I was sort of in the same emotional and mental place as the characters in the show),
* the way the internet was set up at the time (there's no way I'd have gotten that fannish or written that much meta in today's world -- too many platforms, I'd have gotten lost. I think it is harder to be fannish about things now than it was back then.) In 2002, fanboards were varied, but not as varied as they are now. Twitter didn't exist (thank god), nor did Facebook. We had Voy Forums, which while a nuisance at times, were actually easier to moderate, monitor, archive, and follow. You just followed specific threads. Also items jumped to archive leaving room for new discussions. Each board had clear rules. And you usually could figure out what the mood of the board was fairly quickly. There were no GIFS or hard to download photos and vids, or there were, but not quite as many. And, there wasn't as many platforms to keep track of.
* the way the series was shown -- it wasn't bingable. DVDs just began to come out in 2002. We didn't have the ability to binge watch the series like we do now. People either saw it on UPN or an affiliate, or downloaded it from satellite feed to their computers. Or they saw it on a channel overseas that had rights. As a result, you had to be more careful about spoilers. And there were long waits between episodes. So lots of time to write meta, speculate, and entertain yourselves on boards.
* less content back then. I only had access to about fifty channels if that. I had Standard Cable.
UPN barely came in. At one point I had basic or just broadcast. So I was only really watching a handful of shows. Also, I had a VCR not DVD player, so we could only tape one show at a time. Filling tapes. It was harder to see past episodes, and if you missed one, you networked with other fans to get it. Also taped it on FX, which showed the previous seasons.
The internet was just starting to explode. Less information. And less websites. Easier to find things. Google didn't exist. It was a different world.
Now? There's just too many choices. And you get things so quickly. Also, when one show ends, there's another out there that you can binge. If you miss an episode -- you can get a hold of it elsewhere.
You don't need to ask someone on a fanboard to provide you with a link to it, or help you get a hold of it. There's no long waits between episodes...so you don't need to speculate, discuss, analyze or try to figure out where it's headed. The anticipation time is less.
No, if Buffy had premiered in 2010, I doubt I'd have become part of the fandom. It wasn't just the content, but a combination of who I was then, what I needed and what the world around me provided.
And that just hasn't happened to me again. I'm not upset about that. I don't really miss the fandom as much as you'd think. I'd say I miss the people -- but many I've stayed in contact with in other ways. There's a few that I've lost contact with completely, but that's true with everything.
I don't regret being in the fandom. It came at a time in my life in which I desperately need it. And it sort of saved my life. Also, there's people from it, that I'm still in touch with and friends with now. And I'm thankful they are still in my life. I'd not have met them otherwise. I'd like to think I might have...but I doubt it. So I'm grateful for the Buffy fandom, I'm grateful that the show existed. And I'm glad that of all the fandoms that I chose to be become a part of, I picked that one.
It was a pretty cool fandom. It still is, in its own way, even though I've long since left it.
2. Random quotes taken out of context on my correspondence list that made me laugh.
* "The psychologist is a ghost" - from an icon
* "That was Excellent. I'd Bang You Again." - from a greeting card found on SmartBitches. (I'm amazed such a thing exists.
* "Do you have any stationery?
What is stationery?
Paper? Envelopes?
No, why would you need that?
To send a letter.
Why don't you just send an email?"
- from a tweet by Shaun Cassidy who was staying at a hip hotel in NYC, and asked for stationery.