More musings on Flist, Buffy, Livejournal...

[shadowkat]

If you've friended me at any point - you may have noticed that I do not
tell you what this journal is about or include a bio. Basically, because
I figure the title says it all - as does the journal. I spontaneously write whatever pops into my head. As for friending? Well too complicated and none of your business. Did just find and friend solitude1056 - who I think may be the same one from Atpo, whom I've missed. I may not always agree with the writer, but always find them fascinating. Course they have a filtered journal and since I haven't a clue how that works, I may or may not be able to read their posts.

Filtered journals. Friending. Reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend last night - the friend stated that in a way conversing on livejournal was *safer* than talking to ones friends or conversing with people. Talking to strangers was safer. No judging. Oh they judge, but you don't know what their judgements are. And if you don't like them? Ban that person forever. Or delete. In livejournal you are more or less writing with a net. No fears of rejection. (Not that it doesn't occur, just that the impact is somewhat lessened.) Not sure if this friend is right or wrong. Been pondering it off and on all day. Is it safer writing and posting messages to strangers than emails and letters to friends? Is it safer posting on a discussion board under a pseudonyme than in livejournal with the journal locked? Or more dangerous?
Can such a thing be determined? Or even explained to someone who doesn't do it? I have quite a few friends who think I'm a tad nuts for having a livejournal or just can't comprehend why I do it. And I've given up trying to explain it to people. You either get it or you don't. Sort of like reading comic books and watching BTVS - you either get or you don't.

Speaking of BTVS - re-watched I Robot You Jane last night and I caught a theme that I hadn't before. Possibly because I now have seen the entire series. At any rate, the episode is an interesting take on relationships. The desire for love. How we search for it. And coupled with Teacher's Pet, Angel and Never Kill A Boy on The First Date - it emphasizes the differences between Buffy/Xander and Willow. Willow seems to be attracted to the person. How the person relates to her. Her friendship with them. Their conversations. She has a huge crush on Xander, but clearly has known Xander for years. The crush is based on their time together, their friendship. Xander, meanwhile, has fallen head over heels for the new girl, Buffy, whom he just met. His crush is based on what she looks like, how she dresses, how she acts. Not on who she is inside, he can't possibly know that having just met her. Buffy's crush is not on Xander, who is becoming a friend and she sees day-in-and day-out, although she likewise has just met him, but on the dreamy, mysterious, incredibly hot Angel. (A guy that every woman fawns over - heck the writers picked him not for his acting ability but because the women on the production staff melted in his presence. )Even Owen in NKABFD- Buffy picks for his looks and romantic demeanor. Willow is the only one who consistently chooses the person inside.
Oz and Tara both grow on Willow, she falls for them over time based on conversations, commonality of interest. Willow falls for the person, regardless of gender, height, hair color, looks, etc. Which may be why it was so important to the writers to have Willow in a happy relationship at the end of the series. Or to be the one who found true love, because of all of them, she was the only one who seemed to know how to find it? Interesting angle to see the series from. I think the theme may have worked a tad better though if they'd had more time to develop the relationship between Kennedy and Willow, and Kennedy hadn't been a last minute replacement for the planned Tara arc in S7. But overall? It works. I think.

Comments

[atpolittlebit.livejournal.com]

That is indeed our very own Sol. Who is just as funny and witty on LJ as on the board.

I agree entirely with your observation about Willow. That was one of the very few things that led me to speculate (to the amount that it interested me to bother) that Willow might be 'bi' rather than 'gay'. Because she was always attracted to and fell for the person, not necessarily the gender.

I had a conversation once with Random about the Buffy, Willow and Xander relationships in which I had observed that in all of the long-term (and most of the short-term) relationships, none of them were the pursuer. Angel made the initial contacts with Buffy (including the Xander:"It's-not-that-cold" giving of the leather jacket), Oz was attracted to and then pursued Willow until she began to see him in a romantic way, Anya didn't give Xander much of a chance to refuse, Riley went after Buffy as did Spike, Tara made the first moves toward Willow and certainly Kennedy did as well. Xander and Cordelia, now, that one was a mutual trainwreck. *g* Not sure if this says anything about them, but I found it intriguing. [Aside---I've always been highly amused at the speed with which Xander forgot the existence of his one-true-love Buffy the moment he saw Apata! LOL!]

The Joys of "Inca Mummy Girl"

[cjlasky.livejournal.com]

I know. Everybody says IMG sucks. (Or is "disappointing" after all the Spike/Dru yumminess of School Hard. I realize the writers hit the Buffy/Ampata parallel too hard, and the climax isn't exactly gripping. But it's a personal favorite becasue of all the B/X/W character development and how their interaction has changed radically from S1.

First of all, By the time IMG rolls around, Buffy is no longer Xander's "one true love." That died in the season opener, When She Was Bad. Buffy's seductive dance o' evil and her inadvertent endangerment of Willow knocked Buffy right off Xander's pedestal. In Some Assembly Required, we get the seeds of the Xander/Cordy relationship when Cordy thanks him for his bravery. (This will come to fruition in What's My Line.) Xander still resisted going for Willow (idiot!), so Ampata came along at exactly the right time. And yes, Xander went for the extraordinarily beautiful exotic foreign girl at first sight. Can't blame him there. He's 17 years old--looking at linoleum makes him want to have sex, remember?

Then we get the introduction of Oz (yay!), and it's just beautifully done. Willow entices him by virtue of sheer Willow-ness. The Eskimo costume, designed to hide her physicality, hooks the one guy in the room who's deep enough to be attracted by the spirituality in her face.

Buffy, meanwhile, is moping over her complex relationship with Angel, and she's alarmed by the shift in the Scooby dynamic when Xander becomes infatuated with Ampata. We wonder for a moment (and this is not the last time in the series that we do wonder) if the delicate balance of the B/X/W team is going to be thrown out of whack, and everything will collapse. But in the end, Xander dumps Mummy Babe and sticks by Willow to the death. Buffy sees that Xander's loyalties lie with the gang, and she's reassured. Coming out of the "crush" phase (on Xander's side, of course) of their relationship, Buffy and Xander are starting to see each other as true friends. Buffy finally gives Xander the affirmation he's been waiting for since WSWB, and that caps the episode perfectly.

Re: The Joys of "Inca Mummy Girl"

[atpolittlebit.livejournal.com]

I'm one of those viewers who actually likes all of the episodes. *g*

In IMG, I think what I liked about Xander's rapid "Ay caramba" was the way it came 'on the heels' (so to speak) of his "Uh-uh-uh, Buffy? Where are your priorities? Tracking down a mummifying killer or making time for some Latin lover whose stock in trade is the breakage of hearts?" Typical prophetic words for the wrong person. LOL

And I do like the way all the relationships get jostled and then begin to fall into the long term dynamic of the three. Buffy lets Xander know that she really isn't interested in him romantically which inadvertently leads to Willow's learning, accidentally, that Xander really does only see her as a friend while Xander remains generally oblivious to her hopes. With the upshot of it all being that each one still supports the others, and they all need each other. Love that. Particularly because it could so easily have been "another episode where Xander's hormones lead him astray and he's rescued by Buffy and Willow."

And as you mention, I think Oz's introduction into the show was (to borrow from Rob) the Best. Entrance. Ever. His attraction for the Eskimo with the sweetest smile in the room, framed by the parka hood. Nothing but net.

[cynesthesia.livejournal.com]

Hi, SK. Since you mentioned LJs in your post, I hope you won't mind me leaping in. I was an infrequent poster at ATP though I spent a lot of time lurking there over the past few years, especially to read your posts. I wanted to ask would it be OK if I added you to my friends list, since I've enjoyed reading what you have to say on any number of subjects.

I hope I don't sound stalkerish. I'm relatively normal, I swear. [/sheepishness]

As for LJ, I always assume that (unless friends only) it's every bit as public as posting on a message board and I guess this reply might be a case in point. ;) I don't update my own journal religiously, and tend to use it more as a place for posting links to news and articles, because my own ordinary life isn't the stuff of compelling entries and I'm reserved by nature.

I'd agree that keeping an LJ is something you either "get" doing or you don't. I know people who love it and others who shudder at the very thought of it. I don't think there's any one type of LJ, because I've seen very different ones.

Again, hope you don't mind me popping up here out of nowhere and best wishes. :)

[shadowkat67.livejournal.com]

I wanted to ask would it be OK if I added you to my friends list, since I've enjoyed reading what you have to say on any number of subjects.

I hope I don't sound stalkerish. I'm relatively normal, I swear.

Of course it's okay. Don't mind at all. My policy is whomever wants to friend me can. Just don't take it personally if I don't friend back. It's not personal, honest. (And I don't expect people to friend me back if I friend them.) I rarely do friends lock posts, so it doesn't matter that much anyway.

And thank you so much for the compliment.

[cynesthesia.livejournal.com]

Thanks and you're welcome.

Just don't take it personally if I don't friend back. It's not personal, honest.

That perfectly OK, and you're always welcome to stop by mine. :)