Bad Television, Bad...
Sep. 25th, 2018 09:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shadowkat1. New Television Series tried so far and...well...
* I Feel Bad
I feel bad for not sticking with this show for more than five minutes..no, wait, I really don't.
The critics said it was two shows, one a watchable family sitcom, and one an unwatchable workplace comedy. I didn't make it five minutes into the family sitcom.
This will be gone in a month. Or retooled. One or the other.
* Magnum P.I.
Well, I can't say I wasn't warned by the bad reviews. Except the critics made it further than I did...my suspension of disbelief was sort of blown sky-high when Magnum played by Jay Hernandez, jumps out of a spaceship, in a space-suite to parachute into North Korea and save a family. Uhm, first of all...it is physically impossible to parachute in a space-suite from outer-space. You'd burn on re-entry. Not to mention radiation. And the inability to direct your gravitational jump to the surface. It's not like this information isn't available to writers out there. Come on.
But I might have been able to hand-wave, if the lead had any charisma. He doesn't. Tom Sellack, he's not. (Not that I ever was much of a fan of Sellack or the series, but it did have a certain charm that is completely missing from the first five minutes of the reboot.)
Yes, there's so many television series on nowadays that if something doesn't grab me within the first five to ten minutes? I delete.
I'm willing to predict that this will be gone in a month or two as well.
2. Dancing with the Stars
I got curious and tuned in to see who the constestants were this go around. And uhm...we only have about five out of the ten or fifteen that are worth watching. It's not a good season.
- Mary Lou Retton (how old is she anyhow? She looks older than I am...although makeup helps). She can sort of dance. Considering she was a gymnast -- but it was a VERY long time ago, not surprising.
- Nancy McKeon -- Jo from Facts of Life. You know the character that was dating a young George Clooney in the 1980s? She looks like I do. This is reassuring. She can't dance though. Stiff.
- Luna Lovegood from Harry Potter...I kid you not. And no, she can't dance, but she's better than McKeon.
- Pablo from Fuller House (I don't watch this, I didn't watch the first version), and Mamma Mia. He can dance. Hardly surprising considering he danced in Mamma Mia.
- Bobby Bones (?) -- some radio disc jockey, who can also dance. As the judges described him, rather accurately, I thought, as a combination of Jerry Lee Lewis on a lot of caffeine and Sheldon.
- Tinasha -- a singer/dancer who has toured with various pop stars. She can dance (well, I'd hope so, considering it's what she sort of does for a living).
- John Schneider (from Dukes of Hazard, which I also never watched. I'm not a fan of dumb character slapstick/parody comedies, which unfortunately makes up about 67% of American Comedy. But I've liked the actor/singer in other things). He can't really dance either.
- Joe the Grocery Guy from The Bachelorette (which I guess means something if you watch The Bachelor or the Bachelorette...personally, I'd rather have someone stick needles in my eyes. But I know people who love those shows.) He can't dance, and will be gone within the week. Boring. No charisma. Worst of the bunch.
- Some female comedian that I've never heard of...and she can dance better than Schneider, Mckeon and Luna Lovegood.
- A social media influencer and swimsuit model. (Okay, a swimsuit model can influence people on social media? What people? That's just....well...it does say a lot about the current state of our society, doesn't it? And nothing good. Folks you know you've sunk to a brand new low if you are following and being influenced by a swimsuit model on Twitter. On the other hand, it also says something about Dancing with the Stars...they are really scraping the bottom of the barrel here, aren't they? They went from daytime soap opera actors to well, models on Facebook and Snapchat and Instagram.) She's not bad, but she's not that good either. She'll be out in a few weeks. Tinasha did the same dance she did and wiped the floor with her. She's boring.
-- A retired NFL Football player who is in frigging great shape and in his thirties or forties. This guy can dance -- which is hardly surprising considering he's a football player and former running back/quarterback. Football is basically either dancing around people with the ball, or ramming into folks. You need to know how to dance to get anywhere in Football. (The only thing I appreciate about football is the strategic dance moves they use to avoid being collided with while carring the ball.)
--- Blind Professional Alpine Skier...who has never danced before. She didn't really look blind to me, so, I'm wondering if she's just partially blind? (shrugs). She can't dance either -- surprise, surprise.
--- Zombie Kid ( Teen Disney Television Movie Star -- from I Was a Teenage Zombie movie (he played the zombie) ) -- who I've never heard of. But I guess Teens have? His partner had never heard of him either and was struck by the fact that he was the same age as her younger brother, seventeen. He wasn't bad -- but he was also on a singing and dancing Disney musical.
Tinasha, Pablo, Bobby Bones, and the Football player got the highest scores. With Mary Lou Retton, the zombie Teen and the comedian with potential staying power.
I don't think I'll stick with it. Found most of it to be head-ache inducing. Outside of The Great British Baking Show/Bake Off, the appeal of reality shows is largely wasted on me. Will state that some of the contestant selections were rather absurd and possibly intentionally humorous as a result.
3. Soap Opera
Spoiler Board Moderator: They'll catch Sonny because his fingerprints are on the gun.
Me: Not on a gun that has been buried for twenty-five years -- the elements will have washed off the fingerprints. Not to mention all the people who've handled it in the interim. There's no way they can get fingerprints off that gun.
Moderator: We all know that doesn't matter, if it's storyline dictated.
Sigh. I may have to give up on the soap opera. Even I have limits. My mother and I have decided to just continue to fast-forward over certain storylines.
* I Feel Bad
I feel bad for not sticking with this show for more than five minutes..no, wait, I really don't.
The critics said it was two shows, one a watchable family sitcom, and one an unwatchable workplace comedy. I didn't make it five minutes into the family sitcom.
This will be gone in a month. Or retooled. One or the other.
* Magnum P.I.
Well, I can't say I wasn't warned by the bad reviews. Except the critics made it further than I did...my suspension of disbelief was sort of blown sky-high when Magnum played by Jay Hernandez, jumps out of a spaceship, in a space-suite to parachute into North Korea and save a family. Uhm, first of all...it is physically impossible to parachute in a space-suite from outer-space. You'd burn on re-entry. Not to mention radiation. And the inability to direct your gravitational jump to the surface. It's not like this information isn't available to writers out there. Come on.
But I might have been able to hand-wave, if the lead had any charisma. He doesn't. Tom Sellack, he's not. (Not that I ever was much of a fan of Sellack or the series, but it did have a certain charm that is completely missing from the first five minutes of the reboot.)
Yes, there's so many television series on nowadays that if something doesn't grab me within the first five to ten minutes? I delete.
I'm willing to predict that this will be gone in a month or two as well.
2. Dancing with the Stars
I got curious and tuned in to see who the constestants were this go around. And uhm...we only have about five out of the ten or fifteen that are worth watching. It's not a good season.
- Mary Lou Retton (how old is she anyhow? She looks older than I am...although makeup helps). She can sort of dance. Considering she was a gymnast -- but it was a VERY long time ago, not surprising.
- Nancy McKeon -- Jo from Facts of Life. You know the character that was dating a young George Clooney in the 1980s? She looks like I do. This is reassuring. She can't dance though. Stiff.
- Luna Lovegood from Harry Potter...I kid you not. And no, she can't dance, but she's better than McKeon.
- Pablo from Fuller House (I don't watch this, I didn't watch the first version), and Mamma Mia. He can dance. Hardly surprising considering he danced in Mamma Mia.
- Bobby Bones (?) -- some radio disc jockey, who can also dance. As the judges described him, rather accurately, I thought, as a combination of Jerry Lee Lewis on a lot of caffeine and Sheldon.
- Tinasha -- a singer/dancer who has toured with various pop stars. She can dance (well, I'd hope so, considering it's what she sort of does for a living).
- John Schneider (from Dukes of Hazard, which I also never watched. I'm not a fan of dumb character slapstick/parody comedies, which unfortunately makes up about 67% of American Comedy. But I've liked the actor/singer in other things). He can't really dance either.
- Joe the Grocery Guy from The Bachelorette (which I guess means something if you watch The Bachelor or the Bachelorette...personally, I'd rather have someone stick needles in my eyes. But I know people who love those shows.) He can't dance, and will be gone within the week. Boring. No charisma. Worst of the bunch.
- Some female comedian that I've never heard of...and she can dance better than Schneider, Mckeon and Luna Lovegood.
- A social media influencer and swimsuit model. (Okay, a swimsuit model can influence people on social media? What people? That's just....well...it does say a lot about the current state of our society, doesn't it? And nothing good. Folks you know you've sunk to a brand new low if you are following and being influenced by a swimsuit model on Twitter. On the other hand, it also says something about Dancing with the Stars...they are really scraping the bottom of the barrel here, aren't they? They went from daytime soap opera actors to well, models on Facebook and Snapchat and Instagram.) She's not bad, but she's not that good either. She'll be out in a few weeks. Tinasha did the same dance she did and wiped the floor with her. She's boring.
-- A retired NFL Football player who is in frigging great shape and in his thirties or forties. This guy can dance -- which is hardly surprising considering he's a football player and former running back/quarterback. Football is basically either dancing around people with the ball, or ramming into folks. You need to know how to dance to get anywhere in Football. (The only thing I appreciate about football is the strategic dance moves they use to avoid being collided with while carring the ball.)
--- Blind Professional Alpine Skier...who has never danced before. She didn't really look blind to me, so, I'm wondering if she's just partially blind? (shrugs). She can't dance either -- surprise, surprise.
--- Zombie Kid ( Teen Disney Television Movie Star -- from I Was a Teenage Zombie movie (he played the zombie) ) -- who I've never heard of. But I guess Teens have? His partner had never heard of him either and was struck by the fact that he was the same age as her younger brother, seventeen. He wasn't bad -- but he was also on a singing and dancing Disney musical.
Tinasha, Pablo, Bobby Bones, and the Football player got the highest scores. With Mary Lou Retton, the zombie Teen and the comedian with potential staying power.
I don't think I'll stick with it. Found most of it to be head-ache inducing. Outside of The Great British Baking Show/Bake Off, the appeal of reality shows is largely wasted on me. Will state that some of the contestant selections were rather absurd and possibly intentionally humorous as a result.
3. Soap Opera
Spoiler Board Moderator: They'll catch Sonny because his fingerprints are on the gun.
Me: Not on a gun that has been buried for twenty-five years -- the elements will have washed off the fingerprints. Not to mention all the people who've handled it in the interim. There's no way they can get fingerprints off that gun.
Moderator: We all know that doesn't matter, if it's storyline dictated.
Sigh. I may have to give up on the soap opera. Even I have limits. My mother and I have decided to just continue to fast-forward over certain storylines.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-26 02:58 am (UTC)I haven't really watched much DWTS in a while. With no slight on it. It's just not a show for me.
Indeed, Football players are almost always very good on this show. Because they are athletic, because of the specific type of improvisational nimbleness the sport requires, and because most of them are used to taking (1) instruction and very specifically instruction about footwork.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-26 04:58 pm (UTC)Mary Lou Retton is 50. She was an olympic gymnast in 1984. But Olympic Gymansts were always very young. Nikki Glaser is the comic - and her comedy style is very much a matter of taste. She's good at what she does, if what she does is what you like.
I was guessing she had to be about my age. (In 1984, she'd have been about 16. Most female Olympic gymnasts are 12-17).
I have to admit I'm not up on stand up comedians. (Last one I saw was the Australian who basically turned stand-up comedy upside down and sideways.)
Indeed, Football players are almost always very good on this show. Because they are athletic, because of the specific type of improvisational nimbleness the sport requires, and because most of them are used to taking (1) instruction and very specifically instruction about footwork.
Yep, of all the professional (non-dance specific) sports..Football, and possibly soccer are the most likely to fit with dancing.
(Ice skating, figure skating, and gymnastics tend to be rather dance oriented to begin with. Although less so gymnastics.)
no subject
Date: 2018-09-26 07:30 pm (UTC)I almost, ALMOST tuned into Magnum because episode 1's title ("I Saw the Sun Rise") referred back to one of the greatest Magnum episodes of all. But... I couldn't do it. Too much of my enjoyment of the original was Selleck, the late John Hillerman as Jonathan Quayle Higgins and Roger Mosley as T.C. (Rick? Eh.) It's almost impossible to recreate that kind of chemistry.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-26 09:30 pm (UTC)I'm still halfway through Monday's DwtS premiere. We started watching in S1 because Mike teaches ballroom dance (and a lot of his students watched it). Then a friend and I began watching together. One thing I've had mixed feelings about is that it's become less a show about learning to dance and more one about people who already can doing elaborate routines.
I get the reasons for the changes -- to appeal to a broad audience as well as keep one for so many years it has to evolve. But it then makes it really clear from the getgo who's likely to be in the finals while people who are so painfully behind compared to everyone else seem even more inept when in fact they're normal. It's really difficult to do any of this competently.
One thing I'm glad about is that they seem to be doing less "drama bait" these past few seasons, focusing on dance and the partnerships instead of personal drama. That's always been my least favorite part of Project Runway either. Although I haven't watched it I give credit to the British Baking series because I gather it has always been one that's comfort watching rather than pointless drama style viewing.
Bobby Bones made me laugh in his excitement at getting through his routine successfully -- and given his scores the judges thought pretty highly of his routine. I think it hurt Mary Lou that she went first because they were starting low.
That said, it was gutsy to do a routine where he was dancing lead among pros in his very first week because that just highlights the differences. But I guess he's not lacking guts and Sharna figured he could handle it. Pretty hard to believe he's never danced before -- we'll see how well he handles ballroom rather than Latin.
I'd hope so, considering it's what she sort of does for a living
See this is what I don't like, when they have ringers like this in a season. She's not a star, she's just a pro. Why is she in this competition?
they are really scraping the bottom of the barrel here, aren't they?
Pretty much. I don't envy their casting people -- it was always difficult to find anyone with name recognition willing to try (and fail) at this sort of competition (plus I imagine the overall schedule is grueling since it involves publicity, not just rehearsal). But for the past 5 years or so they've also been casting for diversity and different demographic appeal. That makes their job even harder given how many people are going to appear each season.
The blind contestant is going to be quite a challenge though I agree since I've no idea how someone truly blind could do downhill skiing competitions. But they've already had various paraplegics on the show and deaf contestants but this is the first visually impaired person.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-26 10:04 pm (UTC)Eh, you have more tolerance for American Situation Comedies than I do. I couldn't get past episode one of Better Things. I'm extremely picky when it comes to situation comedy.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-26 10:14 pm (UTC)They have too many ringers now who are just stealing the show. The moment they said Pablo had been in Mamma Mia as one of the dancers/singers -- I thought, ringer. And Tinasha? Come on. While not all singers are dancers, Tinasha obviously is.
It puts McKeon, John Schneider, Mary Lou Retton, Luna Lovegood, etc at a disadvantage.
The only one of the high scoring dancers, who didn't feel like an obvious ringer was the former NFL football player.
It's also gotten too showy. But, I agree -- not a fan of the drama. That's why I gave up on Project Runway. The joy of Great British Baking Show is there no drama, the contestants are kind to each other, everyone is kind. It's the only reality series on that does this. Also it provides history lessons during various episodes -- regarding the origins of a specific dish. There was one episode that discussed the origins of the donut. And how they were originally made, even going so far as to take us to the locale and a restaurant that still makes them the original way. It has a sort of PBS classy quality to it that all the others lack.
GBBS is by the far the best reality series created. And they can't figure out how to reproduce it. It's hilarious.
no subject
Date: 2018-09-27 01:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-09-27 02:06 am (UTC)1. commercial interruptions
2. aggressive competition
3. too many interviews
It's probably good. But..GBBS has the following things going for it:
1. the scenery (big tent in the middle of a lovely pasture with ducks and waterfall
2. British dry wit
3. British accents
4. Kindness.
5. Baking demonstrations (I have a weakness for cooking demonstrations)
6. Back stories on the origins of various goodies. Such as a waffle made in Holland. Or the origin of the donut (WWII Donut Dollies).
It's sort of a documentary, baking competition, country fair, with dry British wit, and hugs.
Also I don't like Amy Poehler, I do not know why. I know it is politically incorrect to dislike her and Tina Fey, but there it is. ;-) They both irritate me. LOL!