(no subject)

1. Not been reading that much of late...mainly because everything I try does not hold my interest. My latest was "Love Storm by Susan Johnson" which is a selection of the "Smutty Brooklyn Book Club", which looked like fun and I haven't been able to go to until now, due to prior commitments. BUT, I'm not sure I can make it through the book...due to the purple prose.

And I've a higher tolerance than most. I liked to description. But the writer overuses adverbs and adjectives, like most amateur writers. I did when I was kid. But I grew out of it. It's a common flaw in genre fiction and fanfic.

Note - you do not require an adverb or adjective after said on instead of said. You don't ever require the words he or she said, unless it's not clear who is speaking. Delete the words the reader's mind skips.

Sample sentences from "Love Storm" -

"Amelia, eminently sure of her loviliness tonight, dressed in an exceedingly low-cut, figure-hugging violet velvet gown, the stylish train sweeping out around her as Alex faultlessly swung them among the dancing couples, lifted seductively lashed lavender eyes, coyly smiled into the rather forbidding saturine face regarding her, and softly placated, "But Sasha darling, how was I to know Boris would win two nights running at the Yacht Club gaming tables? He stays another night to see if his luck holds."

"With him it has to be luck, a more heavy-handed player I've yet to see," the prince churlishly retorted, the hours of drinking at the Yacht Club this afternoon and evening not conducive to moderating his unbridled Kuzan temper."

ME: Ack. No, no, no. This is killing me. Where is the frigging line editor???

And I start editing.


"Amelia, sure of her loviliness tonight, dressed in a low-cut, figure-hugging violet velvet gown, the stylish train sweeping out around her as Alex swung them among the dancing couples, lifted lashed lavender eyes, smiled into the rather forbidding face regarding her, and placated, "But Sasha darling, how was I to know Boris would win two nights running at the Yacht Club gaming tables? He stays another night to see if his luck holds."

"With him it has to be luck, a more heavy-handed player I've yet to see," the prince retorted, the hours of drinking at the Yacht Club this afternoon and evening not conducive to moderating his Kuzan temper."


Or..better yet....


Amelia, dressed in a low-cut, figure-hugging violet velvet gown, the stylish train sweeping out around her as Alex swung them among the dancing couples, smiled (up at) the rather forbidding face regarding her, and placated, "But Sasha darling, how was I to know Boris would win two nights running at the Yacht Club gaming tables? He stays another night to see if his luck holds."

"With him it has to be luck, a more heavy-handed player I've yet to see," the prince churlishly retorted, the hours of drinking at the Yacht Club this afternoon and evening not conducive to moderating his temper."

Or pure minimalism.

"As Alex swung them among the dancing couples, Amelia looked up at him and placated, "But Sasha darling, how was I to know Boris would win two nights running at the Yacht Club gaming tables? He stays another night to see if his luck holds."

"With him it has to be luck, a more heavy-handed player I've yet to see," Alex retorted, the hours of drinking at the Yacht Club this afternoon and evening not conducive to moderating his temper."

I know I can be wordy, but...And it annoys me to no end that I paid $7.95 for a traditionally published novel that could have been easily edited.

We don't need all the words. Hint? Only use as many words as is needed to get your point across. Less is always more.

2. So, struggling to find something to read that holds my attention. (Do not recommend speculative science fiction. I joined a sci-fi book club too, and can't get into any of their books either, for separate reasons. You have to be in the right frame of mind for speculative sci-fi.)

Don't worry, this will pass. It's probably due to the fact that I'm on a writing streak. And I can't focus long enough to read, because my own story, inside my own head is taking over.


3. Why is it every fandom I play around with gets caught up in "my characters are morally superior to yours" nyah, nyah, nyah.

No they aren't.

Depends on perspective.

You are missing the point of the story.

Get over your own ego for five seconds. Who made you the arbitrator on morality anyhow?

[This is a daytime soap fandom. The characters have 50 years worth of nasty doings to debate about. LOL!)