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Oct. 30th, 2011 12:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shadowkatI'm feeling very irritable and misanthropic and self-abusing today. It's because I didn't get to go to my church this morning, like I'd meant to nor did I go to the OWS movement with social justice group. So... I'm angry at myself. Had to do laundry and couldn't do it yesterday due to nasty storm. I don't own a washer and dryer nor a car nor do I have laundry in my building, so I lug my laundry in a laundry cart two to three blocks away - this is fine when it is sunny or not raining, but any storm? Forget about it. Beautiful day, today though. Might take a walk and get more yarn to finish the hat that I'm knitting for my niece and hopefully some apples and groceries.
Read this amazing story this morning, one of the best things I've read in a while and sort of makes up for missing church - or what I'd have gotten from my church. It's hard to talk about church online, people are...well it's an incredibly controversial and emotional topic even more so than the Spike/Angel wars or politics, believe it or not. Just as God is a controversial topic. I am a theist and a christian...small c. Although I don't like to be that narrowly defined. I don't believe things can be defined that definitively. My beliefs are like water...they ebb and flow, not like stone.
This long disease my life by Tom Shakespeare
Bits from it:
The more you try to grasp the world, the more it flows beyond you. Understanding is the punch line of a cosmic joke, in Zen.
The problem is that the story is too simple, I think. I have learned that in real life, there are more twists and turns. The black is not entirely black, and the white turns out to be a different colour entirely. There are never only two choices. I am trying to find a new story, but I am finding it hard. It takes too long to explain it all, and I keep on losing the thread. I am sure it would be easier if I just told the old story. Many people still like it, certainly. But how can I tell a story if I am not certain that it is true? Of course, this is not a true story either. But that's different.
I make where I am going much more important than where I am, to the extent that there is no longer any point in going there. This is not the right philosophy.
Read this amazing story this morning, one of the best things I've read in a while and sort of makes up for missing church - or what I'd have gotten from my church. It's hard to talk about church online, people are...well it's an incredibly controversial and emotional topic even more so than the Spike/Angel wars or politics, believe it or not. Just as God is a controversial topic. I am a theist and a christian...small c. Although I don't like to be that narrowly defined. I don't believe things can be defined that definitively. My beliefs are like water...they ebb and flow, not like stone.
This long disease my life by Tom Shakespeare
Bits from it:
The more you try to grasp the world, the more it flows beyond you. Understanding is the punch line of a cosmic joke, in Zen.
The problem is that the story is too simple, I think. I have learned that in real life, there are more twists and turns. The black is not entirely black, and the white turns out to be a different colour entirely. There are never only two choices. I am trying to find a new story, but I am finding it hard. It takes too long to explain it all, and I keep on losing the thread. I am sure it would be easier if I just told the old story. Many people still like it, certainly. But how can I tell a story if I am not certain that it is true? Of course, this is not a true story either. But that's different.
I make where I am going much more important than where I am, to the extent that there is no longer any point in going there. This is not the right philosophy.
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no subject
Date: 2011-11-06 01:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-11-06 01:44 pm (UTC)