Faith...the size of mustard seed
Dec. 16th, 2012 02:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shadowkatDifficult and painful week. The sort of week that makes you wonder why you bother, why you should keep going, and wouldn't it be nice if I lived somewhere far away from humanity. As I told someone today - "I've been fighting people at my workplace all week - life in a public agency."
Feel like I've been fighting and navigating the world all by myself...and by Sunday, my shoulders, neck and back just had a consistent dull ache. Today it is dull and rainy. Spritzing. The type of weather that makes you grumpy and achy all over. I feel emotionally, spiritually and mentally exhausted. I hit the wall long ago. And I'm tired of bashing my head against it. Tired. Just tired. I think I need a massage. But no time.
Found out today on Facebook that my first love/college boyfriend and his wife lived down the street from the shooter in Sandyhook, CT. It had been a safe place. A haven they'd retreated to. They went to a vigil last night in the town, where he played Leonard Cohen's Broken Halleugha on the guitar. He reports how incredibly surreal it has all been. The shooter was a normal guy...20 years of age, who just snapped. My friend is a social worker and has worked in health care. He says he fervently hopes this tragedy will open up discussions on greater accessibility to mental health care and address our culture of violence.
Today I heard or saw various stories about belief and faith...about how all you need is a faith the size of one mustard seed to move mountains. Reminds me of that old Frank Sinitara song..."high hopes move rubber tree plants" or "the little engine that could". The speaker reminded me that we aren't in it alone, we can get help. But...She said something else as well...she talked about how those of us who are lonely, who do not have family and friends close by to depend on or support us, can feel abandoned at times or reach a point in which it is hard to keep moving forward.
So if you know anyone who does not have a family close by or lives alone or is trying to make it through the dark days of December by themselves? Take a moment to do a random act of kindness.
Here's some links to inspire you:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/moments-that-restored-our-faith-in-humanity-this-y
http://now.msn.com/random-acts-of-kindness-photo-gallery
Feel like I've been fighting and navigating the world all by myself...and by Sunday, my shoulders, neck and back just had a consistent dull ache. Today it is dull and rainy. Spritzing. The type of weather that makes you grumpy and achy all over. I feel emotionally, spiritually and mentally exhausted. I hit the wall long ago. And I'm tired of bashing my head against it. Tired. Just tired. I think I need a massage. But no time.
Found out today on Facebook that my first love/college boyfriend and his wife lived down the street from the shooter in Sandyhook, CT. It had been a safe place. A haven they'd retreated to. They went to a vigil last night in the town, where he played Leonard Cohen's Broken Halleugha on the guitar. He reports how incredibly surreal it has all been. The shooter was a normal guy...20 years of age, who just snapped. My friend is a social worker and has worked in health care. He says he fervently hopes this tragedy will open up discussions on greater accessibility to mental health care and address our culture of violence.
Today I heard or saw various stories about belief and faith...about how all you need is a faith the size of one mustard seed to move mountains. Reminds me of that old Frank Sinitara song..."high hopes move rubber tree plants" or "the little engine that could". The speaker reminded me that we aren't in it alone, we can get help. But...She said something else as well...she talked about how those of us who are lonely, who do not have family and friends close by to depend on or support us, can feel abandoned at times or reach a point in which it is hard to keep moving forward.
So if you know anyone who does not have a family close by or lives alone or is trying to make it through the dark days of December by themselves? Take a moment to do a random act of kindness.
Here's some links to inspire you:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/moments-that-restored-our-faith-in-humanity-this-y
http://now.msn.com/random-acts-of-kindness-photo-gallery